The EURO's are over! The Nazi's have lost. Spain are the new champions. Underdogs? Bollocks! Now every Liverpool and Arsenal fan will be gloating about how much their heroes Fabregas and Torres contributed.

If you'd like some statistics about the tournament, you've come to the right place. If you don't, well that's too bad then now ain't it?

Top Scorer: David Villa (SPAIN) - 4 Goals

Top Scoring Team: Spain- 12 Goals

Only Unbeaten/flawless team: Spain

Man Of The Match -- final: Xavi Hernandez (Spain)

AND

Only team to beat Russia twice: Spain

I think you have an idea where i am going with this. Despite being a true die-hard Oranje supporter, it has to be said Spain are deserved champions and are truly the best team in Europe.

P.S: England aren't even in the top 16.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we are 4 hours and 20 minutes away from the final of the third greatest football tournament in the world. But considering Holland are already knocked out, who gives a shit?

Anyways, yesterday we celebrated our beloved pal Choo "Pork Chop" Jay-Son's 18th year of existence. We announced his arrival to the age of manhood by celebrating in Italiannies, where i promised myself to keep up with my recent dietary habits by eating ONLY calamari caesar salad.

Giving his car amatuer spoilers

JaySon decided to give the guys a treat by treating us to a plate of kickass calamari, and little did he realise the spaghetti with Italian meatBalls he had ordered wasn't for personal, but instead for 4-6 people.

the king acknowledging his croonies to eat

pranking him into ordering the spaghetti for 6

The before (its alot bigger than it looks)

and the after

My diet plan seemed to be working, having finished my Caesar Salad and feeling just right. Unfortunately, temptation crept in. With 2 Italian meatBalls unfinished, it is not right to simply let it go to waste now isit. Thus, thanks to me, and some minor help from the other guys, the monster that is the spaghetti with Italian meatBalls was finally conquered.

How not to look gay by T2 (only applies to the back row)

Cheeky

Cheekier

Insanity

assfest 101

We ended the day walking around and doing crap, as shown by the picture above.

P.S.: Jayson celebrated his new found freedom by entering a massage parlour*.

*A Thai one

If there ever was one thing that brings you pleasure for that particular moment, only to hit you that you're being a complete idiot later, its spicy food. No one can deny spicy food is awesome, just read "The Alphabet of Manliness", arguably the greatest book ever known by mankind. But of course, there's where the awesomeness ends.

Manly

Eating spicy food makes people, particularly men, more proactive and confident. It is a known fact that the spicier the food a man can take in his diet, the bigger the bollocks the man has, thus giving a huge boost to his ego. This would come in handy due to the frequent trips to the toilet one is expected to make due to the effect of menstruating women's biggest enemy, Chilli.

Menstruating women's biggest nightmare

A statistic has shown that Mexico has the largest rate (84%) of sewage cleansing in proportion to its population number in the whole world. Now, as Mexico's most famous product would be the Jalapeno Chilli, its obvious what is the cause of its huge rate of fecal deposits.

An example of a major fecal contributor

You must be wondering by now why am i describing about chilli. Well put it this way, whenever one ever decides to eat chilli to boost the awesomeness of his/hers noodles, please bear in mind the consequences that could follow. I didn't.















P.S: 60% of statistics are made up

I have decided to come back to blogging, just to express some issues which have pissed me off the past few weeks. To start it off, my first news from my return from holidays was the rise in oil prices. A rise of 78 Cents per litre? what the fuck. One thing i do not understand about all this rise in oil petrol issue is the rebate of RM625. Only a dipshit would be truly satisfied with the RM 625 rebate. Think about it. If the Government are gonna spend millions giving every motorist the rebate, they might as well use the millions to minimize the rise in prices. Isn't that more logical?

what the rise in petrol means to a college student

Another issue was the complimentary rise in food prices all over. Asia Cafe food prices are soaring through the roof. I bought a plate of chicken from the "Mixed rice" stall, without containg rice, and it costs 8 bloody ringgit.

pretty soon, char kuey teow sellers would accept Euros

I could have spent that amount of money spending something more worthwhile, like God's meat (Pork). Why is Pork God's meat? What other animal in the world could u eat every part of their body. you go try eating a chicken's beak and tell me what it taste like.

Chickens, eat your hearts out

But the one thing that really ticked me off is something that happened this morning. I recently read a report where snatch thieves are a dying breed. Utter bullshit. A good friend of mine just got snatch theft by 2 losers on their favourite (only) vehicle, the scooters,(motorbikes are too cool) and left her with some scars, bruises and possibly trauma, aside from the loss of all her belongings. Although its inconclusive to say if they were Malaysia's infamous Mat Rempits, suffice to say that it is a safe bet to consider these A-holes as one of them. If they have that much bollocks as people say, why target innocent teenagers, when there are big,tough men awaiting around the corner, like Chuck Norris. (inspiration of HALO)

the real master chief