Awesome its time for a brand new update! I know its been awhile and that you, my fellow readers, have suffered much pain due to the lack of new posts here. Well i shall provide the perfect remedy with a brand new post, this about my first sexy trip to Malacca.

Firstly, driving to Malacca in a Perodua Kenari, not easy. To be forced to maintain at a ridiculous speed of 120km/h on a Malaysian 5 year old car is highly unrecommended. Fuel consumption was a real bitch. From a full tank from the start of the journey to just 2 bars left when i arrived at Malacca. What the f*ck !

not recommended

Anyhoo, arrived at Malacca around 10am and had to pick up the three stooges, Kar May, Lilian and gaytard Seanie.

i'm gonna get Li Lian for this

We first had lunch in some typical Nyonya shoppe named Donald & Lily's. Curry Laksa there was secksy! Along with Cendol...Omg like cum in your mouth!

Move aside Bree Olsen and Cytherea

We then proceeded to the infamous Stadthuys buildings, u know those lovely red church like thingys. I felt the Dutch-ness in me starting to grow, with the thoughts of SpaceCake, weed and things in between.

i showed my uncle this picture and he told me he took weed at this exact corner last time

Unfortunately didn't ride on Trishaws as there are no Trishaw insurance for me.

a big nono

We found alot of places in Malacca to do some Epic poses. Went to some place with cannons (no its not A'Famosa),




Pulau Besar

not that besar

and of course the Portuguese Settlement for seafood

He's using his LEFT HAND!!

We also went to eat some epic Chicken Rice Balls (nothing beats good soft textured balls) and of course Jonker Walk to drink their orgasm-esque Cendol.

I also got a God Damn fine for parking at 8.49 AM!!! what the hell! The Malaccan authorities are wayyyy too strict, but fortunately only charged rm15 after a 50% discount :)

Sadly, at around 2.30 pm, while me, jon, waiteng, weijing and jiahuay stayed on to go to the Malaccan zoo, the others decided to depart :(

wai teng left us for her Klang friends

my eyes were f*cked here

Thanks guys for this awesome and memorable trip. The memories collected through the camera lens are as sexy as a full cutout of Jessica Alba. We soo gotta do it again peeps!